(no subject)
Aug. 5th, 2013 02:31 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lykomancerFeeling a touch melancholy.*
Kind of wish I was dating someone. Not in the practical sense. I don't actually want to deal with someone else and their issues. I would, however, like to feel desirable again. Not physically desirable, but mentally/spiritually. Most days I don't feel like I've ever known anyone who's really loved me (romantically), but even if I assume that's not true, it's still been over a decade since someone was interested in me as a whole person.
I am unwanted. And that feels harsh.
*I can't complain much though, since this is the first down day I've had since I started my meds.
Kind of wish I was dating someone. Not in the practical sense. I don't actually want to deal with someone else and their issues. I would, however, like to feel desirable again. Not physically desirable, but mentally/spiritually. Most days I don't feel like I've ever known anyone who's really loved me (romantically), but even if I assume that's not true, it's still been over a decade since someone was interested in me as a whole person.
I am unwanted. And that feels harsh.
*I can't complain much though, since this is the first down day I've had since I started my meds.
no subject
Date: 2013-08-05 10:24 pm (UTC)When I bother to fantasize about those holistic relationships I don't actually want to deal with, the imaginary suitors my brain barfs out have personalities very similar to your own.
If that helps any? *shrug*
no subject
Date: 2013-08-06 03:35 pm (UTC)But that's sweet.
no subject
Date: 2013-08-06 07:23 pm (UTC)Snarky, nerdy, intellectual, impatient, self-aware. That's what I fantasize about. Someone who could shut me up.