lykomancer: (I Love My Job...)
[personal profile] lykomancer
Since being at cashwrap for a few months, I have a new round of complaints about people's behavior...



1) I can understand that you might have other things on your mind and don't notice the "ENTER Line forms Here" and "EXIT" signs on either side of the narrow cattle chute that leads from the body of the store to part of the bank of registers; you're thinking about your kids, the time, the heft of the books, the cost, whatever. Got it.
But when I say, "I'm sorry, but the line actually starts down there," and point at the 5 to 20 people who did notice the signs, DON'T GIVE ME HELL. They've been waiting patiently. They have just as much right to be checked out quickly and efficiently as you.

Dude, fucking five year olds can grasp the concept of waiting their turn in line, so why can't so many adults?


2) I don't know where anything is. Seriously. I technically can look it up, but the register computers are slower than molasses in January and looking stuff up is NOT what I'm supposed to be doing.
Go to customer service.
You see it, the big booth in the CENTER of the store with the LIT-UP SIGN? Yeah. Go there.
Seriously.
Asking the cashier standing next to me is a waste of time. She/He will also tell you to go to customer service. No lie.


3) I don't know where anything is.
I don't know where Hallmark or Forever 21 or the Gap is. Don't know. I don't know where you can get XYZ product.
Stop asking me mall questions and then seeming pissed that I direct you to the mall information booth.


4) If you can't wait the 30 seconds for the customer before you to put her money in her wallet and gather her shopping bags, you're an asshole. There's NO REASON to all but shove the previous customer out of the way or reach over her shoulder to hand me your purchase...in fact, if you do the latter, I won't take your book(s) until the other customer has moved on. 'Cause you're being an asshole.
And just because you're in such a tearing impatient hurry...I think I'm gonna take my time. Right.
Asshole.


5) Returns.
If you don't have a receipt, you're screwed. You have no way to prove whether you bought the book in a store or online (or if you even bought it from us!) or how you paid. You get store credit. Lowest possible value store credit.
It sucks, but deal with it. You should have kept the receipt.

...this one's led to the bitchiest customers.
There was the guy who ripped his receipt into confetti and left it on the counter in front of Richard and then, an hour later, decided to do a return. After trying to deal with the guy for about five solid, angry minutes during which this jerk insisted that Richard had to remember him and was just giving him a hard time for the hell of it, Richard finally fished the pieces shredded receipt out of the garbage and I taped it back together.
At that point, I think the guy realized that, yes, we were serious. No receipt = no cash back or credit card refund. EVER.

There were the two psycho bitches yesterday that were probably trying to scam us, who blew their tires because I couldn't refund their credit card for an online purchase.
No, it has to be store credit. I have no way of proving how you paid. If you want a direct refund, follow the return directions on the shipping sheet.
What? You want to talk to my manager? SUUUUUUURE~.
(I dealt with these women for a half hour before I called Dan. I was out of patience by then. Apparently, they'd also been crazy-bitchy to Kris out on the floor, too. If they come back with that attitude again, I bet they'll get bounced.)


6) Related to returns: No, I have NO access to your credit card information.
*BOGGLES*
*SERIOUSLY BOGGLES*
WHY does anyone actually believe this!? In this age of credit card abuse and identity theft, people actually believe that every Joe-Schomoe cashier they interact with has access to their credit card information with the click of a button?! WTFWTFWTFNO.
I can see what type of card you used-- say, Visa, for example-- and I can check the last four digits to verify which Visa you used, but that's it. Completely.


7) If there is not a cashier directly behind the register, there's NO ONE at that register.
I am baffled by the number of people who approach unstationed registers-- with on one even around the vicinity-- and put their purchases down and then stare accusingly at us, like they're offended that we aren't rushing from our registers to whatever one they decided to park at.
If I'm on Reg 3, I'm ON Reg 3. I'm not going to hop onto 7 just because you happen to want to check out there. Tough titties, said the kitty. Move on down the damn line. You have to come my way anyway, as I am closer to the fucking exit.


8) If my head is down because I am writing, I can't see you. Sometimes I have to write things. That means that I'm paying less attention to my surroundings because I am focusing on what I am writing. That means that I won't notice you standing silently at my register until I look up, which could be a minute or two.
...of course, you could say something to me, which guarantees that I will notice you, but you can't choke "Hi!" out of that self-entitlement clogged throat, can you?


9) If I am stepped back away from the register and appear to be having a serious conversation, I probably am. Yes, you are interrupting. Yes, the other cashiers ARE busy at the moment; give them thirty seconds, and then you can go to them without interrupting me.

Gods, why is everyone in such a damn rush?
The funny/annoying part is that most of the impatient people take up most of the time themselves: their kids won't hand over the book to be scanned and they spend five minutes cajoling their little pwecious to let go for five seconds; they can't find their credit card or id; they write checks; they have a membership but have no idea which of their sixteen phone numbers it could be under, etc.


10) Yes, I need to scan the item.
God, there's this one guy-- a serial budger and impatient as hell-- who likes to try to flash a glimpse of his newspaper and toss a quarter at me whilst running out of the store. He won't get in line, cuts in front of other people, and doesn't like the fact that I still have to actually ring the newspaper through by scanning it and all that.
I'm sure he hates me.
I probably hate him more.


11) The line is down there. Please go wait in line. Those other people were waiting first. GO WAIT IN THE DAMNED LINE.

Date: 2007-07-28 02:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kuchenhexe.livejournal.com
... Dude. Just reading your list makes me want to strangle people. You have my admiration for not having taken an axe to them yet.

Date: 2007-07-28 03:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lykomancer.livejournal.com
Those bitches yesterday...

Oh. My. God.
'Zanne, I almost did tweak on 'em.
They start out the conversation thusly:

Them: We want to return this. *hands me object in a bag*
Me: Ok, but hey, if you're going to buy those books you're holding, why don't we just do it as an exchange? That's a bit easier.
One of them: ...well, ok, I guess, but I better get some money back.
Me: ...uh, well, uh... (?>.>) If what you are buying is less expensive than your return, you will.
Them: I guess.

The whole thing was obviously-- obvious in retrospect-- a scam. They wanted to make money off us. They failed because they were rude. If they just took the store credit to begin with they would have been out of there in under five minutes.
Instead, they were there for a half hour and ended up dealing with a manager who was completely stone-faced, unsympathetic, and (by their standards) uncooperative, and they got nothing.

Most people are just annoying. They actually pissed me off.

I'm going to hate the holidays.

Date: 2007-07-28 03:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lovingyouin1963.livejournal.com
OMFG I totally understand T_______T

Everytime someone comes in here without a receipt, I wanna kill myself. I'm going through marital bullshit liek whoa and still don't wanna kill myself as much as I do when dealing with a customer without a receipt.

I don't know how many times a day I say, "Sir or Mam, I cannot give you anything but store credit without a receipt. I'm sorry. Please call Headquarters with any complaints."


...or the idiots that come into RadioShack to return something they bought from WalMart *pulls out hair*

Why must the general population be STUPID?!



Date: 2007-07-28 05:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lykomancer.livejournal.com
If people were just, I don't know, ruefully accepting, understanding that you don't make policy and yet get punished for breaking it, that would make it better. But some people seem to think that getting pissed off at me will change the situation.
No. It doesn't. If anything, it makes me dig my heels in more. People who are understanding get WAY more in terms of service from me because they earn it by being nice.

Date: 2007-07-29 06:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lovingyouin1963.livejournal.com
If people were just, I don't know, ruefully accepting, understanding that you don't make policy and yet get punished for breaking it, that would make it better.

...and trying to explain this to them is like pulling teeth >:/

Date: 2007-07-28 07:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elanivalae.livejournal.com
6) Related to returns: No, I have NO access to your credit card information.
*BOGGLES*
*SERIOUSLY BOGGLES*
WHY does anyone actually believe this!?


This one's reasonable. I had access to hundreds of credit card numbers when I was a cashier. They got printed right on the register tape, and that wasn't locked in. Hell, just the other week I was in a restaurant and used my debit card and the receipt that they gave back to me had my full credit card number, expiration date, and name on it. And where I work now, CC info is stored on the computer, until very recently accessible by everyone who worked there.

Maybe the place you work at is intelligent about these things, but it's in the minority.

Date: 2007-07-28 07:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poftd.livejournal.com
Oh jesus. Even my parents aren't THAT stupid, and they CAN be pretty darn silly sometimes. o_O

Number 10 makes me pity the fate of humanity. D:

A good list.........

Date: 2007-07-29 01:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dracschick.livejournal.com
I try not to be a pain in the blank to the salespeople since I worked in sales at one time.

Date: 2007-07-29 07:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] forgottenlover.livejournal.com
The register thing! Oh gods I get that at work every day. Do they try to interact with the people at either register? NO, they ask the person obviously sitting down eating to ring them up. Because they should move, just for them.

Course, I do a lot of the 'Hi! *very pointedly doesn't move from register* Can I help you?' thing. Empty register=empty people ::gives you cookies::

Date: 2007-07-30 04:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lykomancer.livejournal.com
I DON'T GET IT. What the hell. I mean, I've come to appreciate the people who come up and ask, "Hey, are you open?" because they at least realize that cashiers are not autobots there to service the general public constantly.

Date: 2007-07-30 04:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] forgottenlover.livejournal.com
Today I had an old lady that expected me to abandon the line, and like, the five people in it, to move to the other register because 'She didn't realize that was the one she was supposed to got to'

Dude, lady, I hadn't moved since you walked in

I don't get it either. People who ask if I'm open make me happy. ::nodnod:: though I notice they're few and far between until or unless they're regulars, sadly.

Date: 2007-07-29 06:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] individual.livejournal.com
God, I give you a lot of fucking credit. I hate people, I really do. If I were in your shoes, I'd probably.... well, ok, I wouldn't scream and yell at the people or beat the shit out of them like I'd want too, but I'd probably give them the single second 'you-are-the-most-retarted-person-I've- ever-seen' look before smiling kindly at them and telling them they need to go the fuck in the other direction.

Don't you love how people fucking glare at you and like, scoff if you don't magically know everything? Fucking whores.

Good for you. That's all I have to say.

I understand though, in case you can't tell. =D

Date: 2007-07-30 04:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lykomancer.livejournal.com
I just spent a lot of my time giving people a) the politely incredulous "you got to be fucking kidding me" stare, b) the hostile "oh NO you DID NOT just do that" stare, or c) the blank "I will not comment" stare while speaking in either that slow, careful tone you use with children and the mentally deficient or in smarmy, overly-polite sarcasm that's just subtle enough that they can't actually accuse me of being rude.

Passive-aggressive? You bet. It's the only way I can convey my irritation at idiocy without getting fired.

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