lykomancer: (WOO-HOO I'm NAKED!)
It's quarter after four in the morning, and even though I've only really been awake for five hours, it's tempting to go back to bed and sleep while it's so deliciously cool.
Maybe I'll try to actually study and catch up on all the reading I need to get done for my class-- I missed one day and I'm already behind probably a thousand pages. Fortunately, most of it just covers the basics of literary criticism, so it'll be a lot of review. If I was feeling really adventurous, I'd rehash some of my Greek or Latin, or maybe start working on my own translation of the New Testament simply because I can.

Blessed be to God for thunderstorms and dropping humidity. *dances*

And so I leave you with this:

For now we see as through a glass, darkly; but then we will meet face to face..." I Corinthians 13:12
Scan = Here

*strips and runs outside!*

[Edit: Oh, and check out my new, spiffy, pretty, hideous new colorscheme and background. *licks the multiflavored Envy*]
lykomancer: (Simply Irresistable)
Ok, so appearantly I am now almost completely nocturnal and have been for all of this week (which is why I am sitting here posting at 5:30 in the morning).
- I got my American Religious History paper in, and I think I got my Taoism extension in on time, too. I am still trying to decided whether I actually want to take my J(une)-term class (Hebrew Bible short story); I have no money to play for it, pay for the books, or support myself for another month of school vs looking for a job...but I'm not sure I want to drop it, either. I might need a few more credits on my record for this year; I might need a good grade to salvage my GPA, depending on my grades from winter term; it's only a month long, sounds fun, and it's with Carolyn Pressler... I have until the second day of class to drop-- which will be the 7th-- so I have some time to make up my mind yet.

- My weasel is adorable and sleeping somewhere in my room; I'm not sure where. He's so big now, Marybeth! He grew so fast! And I kiss him and he kisses me and it's all like, true love, or some funky shit. I just wish he didn't try to eat my books...

- Looking for a job. WHY THE FUCK CAN'T I FIND SOMETHING IN MY FIELD? [/ rant] Sorry; just needed to get that out. I'm a good writer, a great editor; why the hell am I jobless/only able to find work at grocery stores and Wal*Mart? Screw you, universe.

- I think my hair is over an inch and a half long now. ^_^ *ish so happy* I can wear it spiked up or slicked down now.

- I am being so profoundly lazy. I get nothing done, 'cause I SUCK. Mightily. Best Hoover ever built. I couldn't get any more pathetic if I tried. I stay up all night dicking around in Photoshop and role-playing. I haven't even been writing smut, much less doing anything else that might technically be classified as productive.
Speaking of that I have three more icons, two in Greek, 'cause I'm fucking cool like that.
It IS all Greek to me! )

Hey, sweet! It's raining and my ferret's chewing on my toes. Good morning, world! ^_^
lykomancer: (I won't be the wasted potential)
I am so burnt out.

I see it; I recognize it; I know it; I own it.
How could I not? It's the exact same behavior every single May, isn't it?... Dragging ass in classes, trying to work up any level of interest, not matter how fascinating I thought it all was to begin with; dragging ass at home-- the last few years it was my dorm room, but no matter; same idea-- loathing having to interact with real people (too much work) and living in a fantasy world through the interface of imagination, avoidance, and the computer screen.
Last year, I did the same damned thing (which is quite clear if you read my journal entries from a year ago-- like these two entries, or this, or this), only last year it was all fanfic-- I wrote "Quintessence of Dust", "More Sinned Against", and "Eclipse" in a less than two weeks; I called it my "hardcore program of absolute avoidance".

I have to write my American Religious History final. The final question is much, much easier than the midterm question was; it only has to be five pages. It only takes me four or five hours to struggle along, forcing and scraping and grinding, to get a five page paper out. I could do this the same way I chose to do my ill-fated Taoism paper; the morning it's due. But I shouldn't and I don't want to. *sigh*
I have to email Ted about said ill-fated Taoism paper, and figure out how to file an extension. *headDESK*
I have to get my integrative notebook at least started. God... *groans, head shaking*
I have to email Chester about getting my backpack back, since I left it in his car the other night. I really want my Brief History of the Human Race back; I was enjoying reading it.
I have to get a fucking job.

All I want, though, is to write fanfics, role-play (and role-play, and role-play, and role-play somemore... talk about avoiding reality! *laughs*), read the stack of books sitting around my room, and play with my ferret.
God, I'm pathetic. Really pathetic.

Oh, and even better. I still have another month of classes, unless I drop my J-term. *shakes head* Hebrew Short Story with Carolyn, three times a day, four days a week. @_@ WTF was I thinking...?
lykomancer: (Sanctified)
I go to seminary.
Seminary, for those of you who don't know, is a graduate-level theological school for the training of priests, ministers, and/or rabbis. Yes, I am training to become a Unitarian Universalist minister.

While I am sitting through my three-hour long classes about God and the Bible and religion, I find myself strangely inspired. I think of all sorts of dirty, lemony, slashy, cream-filled FMA yaoi stories, plots, and pictures.

Ok! I'd like to repeat that, just in case people missed it.
While my professor is up in front of the class yammering about Paul and Galatians and the Christ of Faith vs Jesus the Man and Augustine and so on, I'm busy scribbling down ideas in my notebooks that involve Edward Elric getting the crap beaten out of him by a pissed and horny Envy, the best way to incorporate Fight Club quotes into Greed/Kim smut fics, and how to finally get Wrath into the dirtier parts of Cat's Cradle.

I am so going to Hell.

Tonight's new fic ideas--
1) "I'm gonna wash that filthy little mouth of yours out with soap!" Envy/Wrath
2) In Father Figure, it's clear that Envy shifts into Ed-form and jerks-off. Envy!muse feels like telling me more about that.
3) [profile] tsukiguujin and I did some playing together, and m'Envy!muse was inspired. He would like to...decorate...Edo.
4) After several hazardous negotiations with Kim!muse, we've reached some mutually satisfactory ideas of what to do to Greedo-san.'s a good thing he regenerates, that's all I got to say about that.
5) Just to assure that Hell doesn't reject me, I have considered starting a post-series Wrath/Al. O_o! WTF. Seriously. W. T. F.

Seminary = Where Jess goes to think about porn!
lykomancer: (Going Nowhere Really Fast)
I am having some really stupid moments.

First, not realizing my back account was so low that I'm scrabbling for rent, and then remembering the newspaper bill, my therapy bills, the internet bill, my summer class bill, my OUTRAGEOUS book bill at the school store, the money I promised Tsuki...

And then I lost my #%&@!ing bus pass. A forty-five dollar one. That still had over twenty-five dollars left on it. While normally this doesn't bother me too much-- I figure, someone else will find it, and it goes into the pool of Good Bus Karma-- but right now, it's something else I need to spend money on, 'cause otherwise I can't get anywhere. >.<

I have a presentation today in the first hour of class. I have...a few notes. Mostly, I'm hoping to wing it and not fuck up too bad. My only priority is not failing. Other than that... *shrugs* Meh.
So I was half-assed thinking about that this afternoon.
I was also talking with a few people on IM, getting wrapped up in conversations and barely glancing at the clock, knowing I was going to run a bit late, and that I'd be cutting it close today.
I was also dipping into a new piece of fanfic that is flowing so smoothly, so loverly...

It goes to figure that when I finally get to my bus stop, I realize that I forgot the money to pay!

Fortunately for me, Wendy is still home and can give me a ride up to school before class/she goes to work, but...DAMN! I lost my bus pass, can't afford to get a new one, barely know what I'm presenting on, ran late for my bus, can't catch it 'cause I didn't have a quarter on me, and am now worried about running late for my presentation! GRR!

*shakes fist at sky, feeling very Old Testament*
God damn you, God!

I got to school with plenty of time. *relief* So, what do I do before my presentation? Review, reread, organize, prepare?
...Hell, no! I snipe RP journal comments and get hit on by the really cute black guy in the computer labs! Go, responsible adult, go!


Apr. 18th, 2005 05:26 pm
lykomancer: (Squee!)
So, I got my American Religious History midterm from Hell back today.
Not too shabby, considering how broad of a topic the question(s) covered, how little interest I had in the answer(s), how little work I did, and the fact that I didn't even know the citation style he wanted us to use.
(And a lot of my mark-downs were minor grammar flaws like tenses and stuff from me rearranging and cutting and then not fixing the format, all of which might have been prevented if I'd have let someone else in my household read it.
Oh, well. I passed, and that is all I wanted from this.)

Tomorrow, I will probably get my much-better Taoism paper back, which I am more interested in.

In the meantime, I have to start working on my evaluation folder 'cause that's relatively important, and I want to find my groove on this bloody piece of fanfic that I started and can't seem to get past page three on.
lykomancer: (Power corrupts)
So apparently I have to do a short (three page or so) evaluation of what I have learned in my first year of seminary and how I have integrated the different classes together with real life.

*sigh* And here I thought I was almost done with my required writing for a while.

Also, in my professors' evaluation of me, I was called "angry, arrogant, and belligerent."
That's nice of them, huh? They certainly don't mince words.

It's funny; Paul-sensei read the list of adjectives off to me, then removed his glasses and looked at me with a smile: "I don't think you are any of these things."
Then we bonded over how intellectual aggression is often mistaken for arrogance, since he was apparently was also told that he was angry and arrogant in seminary! *laughs*

YAY! I luff my Paul-sensei soooooo much! He's so cute!
(And I've told him that, too. ^_^)
lykomancer: (depressed)
A friend-- you know who you are-- once commented that she was boggled that I could be happy going to seminary.
I am.

Cause I Get Tired of Seeing How Much I Babble, This Is Cut )

Anyone wanna help me write/draw up Unitarian Universalist versions of Chicktracts? XD
lykomancer: (depressed)
Soaring Dragon

~my body stretches and balances, recalibrating; colors ripple and swirl around me in fiery currents of chi, drifting upward like smoke and blazing behind my gently closed eyelids-- yellow... I see yellow like pure sunlight on fields of jonquils and daffodils, bobbing and bending in the cool, damp spring breezes and I bend with them, bending with the currents of tranquility and it's yellow, it's all yellow... saffron and sunshine and topaz and lemon...caramine, cornsilk, butter, amber flickering all around me, twining in my hair and sliding over my skin like tendrils of primrose-scented incense, burning my mind with brightness like the sun: my mind is as keen as the play of light on the edge of a blade; I am radiance~

Swimming Dragon

~my body curves sinuously, hips and spine twisting like a snake navigating the Susquehanna River, all skin and scales and sleekness; I part pools of deep, restful serpentine-blue and inhale, sucking the currents into me and feeling my own body (82% H2O) respond, resonating with the Tao that is like a river returning home to the sea, sliding sensuously beneath the serene eye of the full moon which traces over it shimmering silver and subtle shadows, seducing me into submerging myself beneath the slow-moving surface-- I must leave shallow waters and safe shores to seek my own soul's true strength~

Standing Dragon

~my body rests; the dragon waits aside the bubbling hot spring, claws buried in the clean, wet, heavy earth-- my bare feet sink into the floor like the gnarled roots of wise, ancient willows, soaking up the power and stability from the ground... I am the bridge between heaven and earth; I am the dragon of Midgard wrapped around the meridian, eating her own tail, causing tectonic plates to roil against one another my food moves down my gullet; I bleed red (red-hot magma, liquid stone) and sweat geysers... I bring forth life~
lykomancer: (Default)
OMFG... this is so entirely FUBAR. It's educational, and anti-Bush. And that little bitch Paris Hilton killed my Christopher Reeves, dammit. But I got to squash Tom Ridge and the breeding Bushes. That was cool.

I overslept and missed my therapy. Damn. Y'know, I thought about setting my alarm clock last night, and then I thought, Nah... it shouldn't be a problem; I'm actually going to bed at a normal time. Well, it was a problem, as my body decided it needed 12 hours of sleep... weird, because usually I wake up a few times through-out the morning when I sleep past ten or so, but I didn't. I got up at 6-- saw that Jen's light was still on-- went to the bathroom and got some water, and then didn't move until 1:20ish.

Taoism is going to be a wonderful, wonderful class. I'm so glad I'm taking it.
(*gets distracted*) Mmm... Crab chip-breakfast... Crab chips are delicious, and mine!
Right, Taoism. The professor's a Unitarian who wandered in wearing a funky Cat-in-the-Hat/jester's cap combination in blue and yellow. We did some Qi Gong and Tai Chi in class; we have such things as Taoist Cooking and Journey to the West on reserve in the library for us; part of class involves going out for Chinese food twice, and learning about the Tao of tea. Ted's planning on having his acupuncturist in, who needs a translator, because she's actually from China. I love it.

It's funny, too, 'cause I was thinking yesterday that maybe some of my confusion lies in my own dualities. Neither completely human nor animal; acting both canine and feline; both female and male; not hetero- nor homosexual; possessing traits of extroversion and introversion; pnuema and sarx. Does identity matter? At what point do your own contradictions begin to tear you apart?
And in Taoism, that was addressed. (Ok, maybe not that -exactly-, but you know.) Within the Tao, there is no stress between complete opposites; they compliment and fullfull each other. There is no stress. The vinegar may be sour and bitter, but that is exactly what makes it vinegar, and that is a wonderful thing.
lykomancer: (Default)
Lessee if this coding works. (If it doesn't, this is going to look strange.)
...ok, it works if I lj cut it, so it's cut to look better.

The Greeks don't want no freaks )

Heh! ^_^ I'm so cool.

I'm tutoring someone's daughter starting at the end of this month for 13$ per hour.
I love all of my housemates (but wish they'd clean up more of their stuff that's lying around the house.)
Wendy's never had a real birthday party, so I want to throw one at the end of the month. Anyone who can send cards or randomly show up to wish her a happy 24th is encouraged to do so.
Teresa-san is entirely too hot for me to function properly around.
And life is good.
lykomancer: (Default)
Well, for the first time in over five years, I've finally begun drawing again. Not those piddling half-realized sketches, not anime-style junk-food portraiture with no backgrounds and half-assed colored with Prang pencils, but REAL drawing. Shading, detail, backgrounds, perspective, symbolism.

I went out and spent 70 bucks on new art supplies: Prismacolor pencils, waterproof India ink, finepoint dip-pens, Micro Pigma markers, camel hair watercolor brushes, tubes of watercolor gouche, a heavy-weight fine-toothed 8x11 drawing pad. Totally worth it, though I actually haven't touched any of it yet (...except to unwrap it from the plastic and gloat over it, sniffing the "new stuff" smell). I wanted to finished the last picture I started with the old before I broke into the new.
And what a picture it is that I just finished! For the for time in years, I sat down an did an entire piece in pointillism-- yeah, I did the whole thing with dots, shading, texture, and all. And it is super-cool.

(And interestingly, I did a brief bored sketch from memory of Theresa-san, and when Julie flipped through my book and saw the sketch, she recognized who it was supposed to be. o.O I don't think it's that good of a likeness...)

And I've got so much homework to do...still working on that #$%&!ing annotated bibliography, but I've go enough done that I think I have plenty of time to find my last six sources and write them up. And I have to remember that I'm on the worship group for Thursday's class, and that I should find some reading or artwork or something to bring. And I really should finish reading Harnack for Historical. And I have to remember to take my sexism collage into class with me on Thursday.
And I want to remember to find a Writer's Market and write down some likely places I can sell some of my older writings both to a) get some money and b) get to say that I actually am published. I want to see if any place will take my photography as well.

And sadly, Tom comes home tonight. Is it wrong of me to hope that bad weather will keep him in Iowa another day?

I suppose I should go get crackin' on my work...
lykomancer: (Default)
So... my therapist-- Xan-- finally decided that I need to take the crazies test and possibly get put on meds.
This is because I told her about my funfunfun week in Ashland; damn, if I had known that's all it would take to get my Zoloft...
I think I frustrate her a lot. I also think she's just trying-- at this point-- to get me to say that I feel "sad" (instead of frustrated/annoyed/angry/disheartened) and to say that I am lonely, which even though I am most of the time, I won't say, though I'll agree with her when she says it.

I got another A- on a Historical paper.
I wish I could be just like Paul-sensei! If I were male, and it legal, I'd marry the man; I love him so damn much-- and I don't even really know why! I absolutely do not understand my infatuation with him, not at all. Although at the potluck on Tuesday before class, I did find out that I'm not the only one. Apparently, he has a small cult following, and no one really gets why they like him so much.
I guess that's what you call charisma!

I also think the married male TA in Historical was hitting on me. !O.o;;; And the chiropractor that's in the class told me that my ribs still hurt-- yeah, still, two weeks after the fact-- because I probably cracked the cartilage. Skippy. And then he told me that he was trying to get rid of some computers; did I want his number?
(Even though he says that they're still Windows 98 and not too much better than the one I've currently got, I'm thinking that I can salvage some of the parts; I mean, what the hell? it's free.)

Speaking of that, I'm browsing computers on the internet, but realize I have no idea what I'm looking for. Could someone give me some stats so that I can have a basis for comparison?
(Like this: "Intel Pentium 4 Processor, 2.8GHz, 512MB RAM, 200GB Hard Drive, 4X DVD+/-RW Drive, Windows XP Home Edition." ...OK, fabulous, and this means what to me?)

I need to stop buying manga.
Like really.
I have about 250$ worth of manga now, and I want MORE! It's like candy; I can't stop buying it. Y'know, I'd say, "OK, I'll just buy the rest of the series I've started, and then stop" but even if I bought the rest I'd just move on to another series. (Like Kenshin, which I've never seen/read but have heard so much about.)
I've totally abandoned my interest in fantasy (except for the Dark Tower series, which is finally finished...but I'm waiting for it to come out in paperback), books on disease, religion...all my favorites...for the junk-food that is manga.
Can't go into Borders; can't go into Borders; can't go into Borders...

And I need to find an art supply store. Like a real one. Although, everytime I ask someone if there's one in the nearby area (no matter where I am), they always direct me to Office Max.
Ok, kids, Office Max is NOT an art supply store. Not by any stretch of the imagination. I know this because, for example, they don't sell linseed oil.
So stop telling me to go there.

I should go to chapel.

HotASLlady is so very, very hot. I ran into her on my way to choir and my heart felt like it literally stopped. It hurt.
I am also very impressed with (I think his name's Brian) the new ASL person that's in Thursday's Historical class (which, since Tom dropped the class we shared on Tuesday night, I more of an excuse to attend, because it's easier for me to get to and from Thurday afternoon's class than to and from Tuesday night's. This means more HotASL-ness. Yippee for me!); he's cute when he smiles, too.

...I'm not really a walking ball of hormones.
lykomancer: (Default)
So most of you know by now that I got my financial aid check.
It's really big. It's lots of money. It's enough money for my to live off of for half of a year, and it only has to last me until February...and then I get another one!


I really want to quit my job.
I can. I can afford to do that now.
I can quit my job and look for another one-- one that is actually satisfying, one that makes use of my expensive, expansive education, one that I won't be ashamed to put on a resume.

However...should I?
Probably not.
I should probably just go down to part-time, and then look for a job.

However, I want most of next week off anyway, and not having a job for a while would give me the flexible schedualing I need to do appointments with my therapist, day-long events, stuff up at school, and I could even go home (or at least somewhere) for Christmas. Plus the fact that J(anuary)-term is a month long session of class everyday, and I don't know how I would do that with the kind of work schedualing I have at my current job; I'm also seriously considering doing a full class load or four classes in spring, which Tom thinks will kill me, and then doing another J-term (June).

Another thing about this is that I want to quit, and I don't want to say, "Here's my two-week's notice." I want to basically do a "No-call, No-show" until they give up on me ever coming it, or else just call them up and say, "I quit!" and never go back. I want to be rid of it immediately, not horsing around until the first week in November.

Also, my advisor, Paul-sensei (I hope the two of you are happy; look what you have me doing!), suggested seriously that I talk to the Dean about being a writing tutor, and Tom says that that's a paid position. That would be handy...

lykomancer: (Happy)
I'm having a spectacularly wonderful day.

I spoke to Hot ASL Lady, and I managed to do it a)clearly, b)coherently, c)non-pervertedly. Yes, ladies and gents, I held an actual, reasonable, two-minute conversation with Hot ASL Lady without becoming flustered in any way.
Her name is Theresa, and she was sick today. (Is it bizarre that I find myself slightly hopeful that I caught her germs? I think maybe...) My God, I even touched her to shake her hand.
(For some reason, my brain was very, very insistant on trying to speak to her in Japanese-- and yes, I could have done my entire half as such-- though I don't have any idea why "Onamae wa nan desu ka?" and the rest sprang to my lips and denied almost completely the English equivalent. Thank God for my subconscious and its reflexive nature.)
When I think about this I get a very bad case of the fluff-headed looney giggles. I feel that I suddenly have a firmer grasp on the definition of "twitterpated."

Chapel was touching as always, and I only wish the preacher-of-the-day would just continue instead of stopping. Today's subject was a homily on the story of Jacob wrestling with God, and how our struggles are transforming and our pain a blessing, and I moved, so...indescribably syncopated with Jan's words and message. When life gets too hard, I may be suffering, but there is a purpose to it. I just need to keep in mind that it is not forever; I do have the power to change parts of my situation; this is making me stronger. It brings me closer to God, until I see face to face.
(However, over and over at seminary, despair is described as heresy. Augustine claimed it was the heresy against hope; many preachers and teachers say that it is the inverse of faith... That doubt and questioning are healthy for faith, but that despair and faith are completely incompatible. Having dragged myself through periods of depression and despair, I seriously disagree. It is when I am most in despair that I feel the most faith.)
lykomancer: (Happy)
Second week of classes. My 2-page paper written and turned in, my assignments read, my peer groups introduced...
and I'm having the time of my life! ^_^

I love this! I feel so energized and good here, even during my evening class after working all day since seven am, even during my morning class that begins at eight. I get on campus and I don't want to leave; I could happily hang out here all day... in the library, on the lawn. Where ever. I feel great-- focused, aware, attentive. The people are all so friendly, and my professors are some of the best lecture-ers and speakers I have ever heard. Paul Captez (hey look, Jenny, another Paul!) lectured all Tuesday night, and I was not only interested in what he was saying (and how well he said it), but for the first time in my life, I took lots of notes! Eleazar and Chris, my Intro class profs, find the most eloquent yet understandable ways of making and illustrating points, and I can really see why Chris is the Preaching professor. I can't wait to take her class now.

I attend Thursday chapel ever week so far, and plan to continue doing so, and I just joined the choir-- the first choir I've been in since ninth grade, and man, does it feel good! I'm very excited and hope that we are able to preform for chapel service sometime this year. That'd rock my socks.

And with Tom up in Ashland for two to three days, I get the private alone time I so desperately, desperately need, so I'm feeling a lot more sane. Time sans Tom is happy, tail-wagging Inu-no-Jess-chan time.

I don't mean to say that everything is peaches and cream. I mean, I'm still working thirty-plus hours a week at the freakin' bakery; I failed my budget pretty righteously (I'll talk to Judith about that); and now that I've stayed on campus for choir and to write this, I have just witnessed the weather go from post-card perfect to abysmal in ten minutes and I have to walk to my bus stop; I need a new bus pass badly, and don't feel like going downtown to get one; I haven't heard back about my interview; et cetera, et cetera...

I feel stable, sane, happy, healthy. I am meeting new people and learning new things. I am advancing my education, and involving myself in my community. None of these are bad things.

And the one sign language interpreter for the deaf girl in my Intro class is hot.
Really hot.
I could stare at her-- yes, her; you read that right-- all day. Happily. Hornily. With an idiot grin plastered all over my stupid mug.
Hot ASL translator gives me yet another reason to attend class regularly! ^_~

Thank ya, God, and amen.
lykomancer: (Default)
Just finished my matriculation interview.
God, I think I embarrassed myself somewhere along the way, but I'm not entirely certain when or how.
I don't know whether to say that went well, mediocre, or smashingly terrible...the interviewer sat there squinting in a thoughtful sort of way with her hand crooked up by her mouth while I babbled on and on, hoping I'd hit on something that would convince her I was worth spending the financial aid on.
If there was one downfall in my babbling, it was that I was honest. Honesty about an academic record and study habits such as mine isn't always a good thing. However, she knows I wasn't hiding anything or emphasizing my good points; still, though, I think I might have said too much... To quote Stuart Davis, I need a muffler for my brain.

Shame, shame.

I told her about my bathroom analogy for my vocation, though, and that was entertaining. ^_^
Bathroom analogy (aka: me vs. the urge to go into the M.Div program):
I said it's like you're sitting at your computer playing games or writing a paper, and you are really wrapped up in what you are doing and don't want to stop. However, your body is telling you that a trip to the potty-room might be recommendable in the immediate future. But you ignore it, steadfastly playing or writing and gritting your teeth as the pressure on your bladder gets steadily worse. Eventually you are going to have to go whether you like it or not. That's how I feel. I'm bebopping along, doing my thing and I'm really into it, and yet...I have to go and do the M.Div. Program. I'm ignoring that urge, but it's getting harder and harder to shut it out. Eventually, I think I will have to do it. I really don't want to though, even though I think it might make me feel better-- in the same way going to the bathroom makes you feel better.
Vivid, ne?

God, please let them accept me as a student. Please, please, please! I really need the financial aid.


Sep. 15th, 2004 03:36 pm
lykomancer: (Default)
If I get everything else in and can't be accepted as a full-time student because of my matriculation interview-- or, if I lose my job because I skipped work to do my matriculation interview-- I'm gonna be ungodly pissed off. My transcripts *should* be waiting for me in the mail at home, I have David's letter, I have time tomorrow to do my writing sample... it's that freakin' interview that's the problem.

(If my transcripts aren't waiting at home, Northland's getting a nasty phone call. I didn't pay fifteen extra dollars to get them by next week.)

I feel a little stressed and wish I had more time to write. I'll go home and babble and bring it in tomorrow probably.

I need to run to catch my bus.
lykomancer: (Default)
So I am now registered for two classes: Introduction to Historical Theology on Tuesday nights at 6 and Theological Interpretation- God, Community, and Transformation on Thursday mornings at 8.

Don't they sound like fun and interesting classes, kids?
Gee whiz, what's wrong with you?

I also picked up my books. I probably should have just written the titles and gone home to see if Tom already owned them, but t'hell with it...I've got store credit, and by the time I need to pay it, my student loans will be in. :) I now own suck interesting titles as Preaching as Weeping, Confession, and Resistance, The Handbook of Theological Terms, and St. Augustine's Confessions.

The next two weeks are going to be hellish as far as scheduling goes...

Oh, shit! I just signed myself up for a class at the same time I was supposed to be doing my literacy tutoring training! Fuck, fuck, fuck...
Well, that makes my weeks a little less hectic, I suppose, but now I need to find something else to volunteer for. Damnit.

But I still need to go to Ashland, come back, work, work, go to class, work, go to class on my one day off, work, work, work, (scheduling around the fact that I can't work nights Wednesday because TOm can't pick me up), repeat except for that going to Ashland thing.

I feel your pain, Angela. I really do. We should get good'n'drunk to celebrate our pain.
lykomancer: (Happy)
Feelin' pretty good. Day off; headin' to the library (with the specific intent of picking up a very smutty sounding novel called The Darker Passions: Dracula. MMmm, published smut. I hope to never again be able to watch Hellsing without giggling). Mmm, library. I love the library.
[EDIT: They didn't have it. Disappointing, but understandable.
I got 22 other books instead, gloriously hogging the express checkout counter.

Worked things here at United, and Lo and Behold! I might be accepted as a full-time student with financial aid and everything by mid-September! YIPPEE! All I need is the two letters of recommendation from Carol Shaddy and David Saetre (I've already emailed them about it) and my transcripts, which I can get now because Judith gave me the money to pay back Northland. Provided I get those three things, pass an interview and writing sample (oh, yeah, that's gonna be hard!), and take one more class...I'M IN!
*pant, pant, pant*

[egomaniac hour]
[end egomaniac hour]

*looks around suspiciously*
It's too good. I keep waiting for something to go horribly, terribly wrong. ~knock on wood, cross fingers, pray~

I've also got bitten by the writing bug again, and have written another six pages on Blessed Be. It looks as though it might be a real novel... however, I wonder if it works out well in text, considering that it was originally slated as in comic-style. I keep feeling like all I'm doing is describing the action panel-by-panel, page-by-page instead of writing a real story. I could have this impressing because of the dialog-heaviness of the story thus far though.
I'm having problems controlling Gabriel...she desperately, desperately wants to have sex with the Devil, and she's not supposed to want that. I plotted her to have a thing for the Antichrist, but she's extremely resistant to that idea and quite unimpressed with Lucas. *sigh* Unruly wolfling. Bad dog, bad.

Tom continues to drive me crazy, in all the little ways. He waits until the sink is so full as to be unusable to do the dishes, and then it takes him two days to get them all done; he never takes out the trash; he keeps assuming he's told me stuff that he hasn't, and insists that he has even when I've proven he hasn't; he stands around and stares at things; he gets in the way.
When Tom's around, even making a cup of tea can be work.
I like Tom...I just can't wait until I'm not living with him anymore.

I got to go driving the other night. Scary for Tom, fun for me. I like driving Marybeth's car in the dark down windy roads! Heh.

Angela, I need your address before I can mail you anything! Call me or email me.
Marybeth or Annie: when are you guys coming back to pick up Hotseat and your stuff? Neither Tom nor I can remember if you told either of us...)


lykomancer: (Default)

May 2017

78 910111213


RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Sep. 24th, 2017 03:01 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios